Before you start
Someone is awake and writing to you.
It is late for you, or early. On the other side of the screen is a person who chose to ask. These principles are about answering them well.
Each principle is a two-page spread. The picture page holds one sentence to carry in your head. The reading page gives the idea, how to put it into practice, the evidence behind it, one thing to do this week, and a short note on what Echo does about it. Worksheets and a worked example sit between the chapters.
Read one a day. Do the one thing. Come back to the self-check whenever you are about to press send.
Principle · 1
Listening goes a long way
Earn the right to share by listening first.
Online, you cannot see the person. In text, the tone of voice and the look on a face are gone, so it is easy to miss what someone means and just as easy to answer too soon. Responders who have shared their faith face to face often find this the hardest change.
On the phone you can hear hesitation, but you still cannot see the face. Either way, take a slow approach, hear the whole story, and remember that listening is part of earning the right to share.
In practice
Say back what you heard before you say anything else. “It sounds like you have been carrying this a long time. Is that right?” Do not lean on a tone-of-voice rule of thumb. You will hear that 90% of communication is tone and body language. It is a misreading of a small study of feelings, so leave it out of your training.
Slow should never mean late. WhatsApp closes the reply window 24 hours after the seeker’s last message. Listen well in the first reply instead of waiting longer to send it.
Evidence
Albert Mehrabian’s early studies were small (about 30 and 37 women), concerned conflicting feelings and attitudes, and he has said the figures do not apply to communication in general.1 In a Harvard Business Review analysis of 3,492 coaching participants, the best listeners, as rated by colleagues, did more than stay quiet and repeat back, and most people rate their own listening above average.2 WhatsApp’s window runs 24 hours from the last inbound message and resets with each new one.3
This week
Before your next reply, write one sentence that says back what the seeker told you, in your own words. Send that first.
In Echo
Echo shows the reply window left on every conversation. EchoAnalyst’s first question about every reviewable conversation is whether the seeker felt known: warmth, attention, and their situation reflected back accurately.
Principle · 2
Keep things simple
One clear thing at a time.
People tend to open up online, and it is easy to follow every rabbit trail in their story. We want to relate deeply, but the conversation has to stay focused. Keep in mind what your ministry does best, decide whether that is what this person needs, and then help through simple communication.
In practice
Simple means three things: short messages, plain words, and one next step. Words like “saved” and “grace” need a sentence of explanation for someone who has never heard them.
Do not promise secrecy you cannot keep. People do open up in private messages, so say honestly that the conversation stays with your team, and let your ministry’s privacy policy say the rest.
Evidence
People used to messaging expect quick, small answers. Twilio’s consumer research reports that for over half of consumers (51%) the expected response time is within an hour.4
This week
Reread your last three replies. Cut each one down to the single idea that mattered, and delete the rest.
In Echo
EchoAnalyst scores clarity on every reviewable conversation: simple, organized and matched to the seeker, with jargon avoided or explained. Depth is scored separately, so simple never means shallow.
Principle · 3
Emphasize concepts over words
There is no magic formula. Meet the person.
It is comfortable to follow a formula, 1-2-3-done. Resist it. Share the message of Christ’s love and what he did for us, and the conversation moves along more simply.
Your ministry may have a kit of example paragraphs. Do not force those words into a conversation. Words that do not fit change the tone and leave the person feeling disconnected from you. Find out where they are coming from and what they already know, then adapt.
In practice
Saved replies are fine for hours, links and logistics. For the heart of a conversation, say it yourself. Do not paste in an AI draft either: a seeker often can tell when nobody is there.
If a seeker asks whether they are talking to a bot, answer plainly. Honesty comes first, and a person is exactly what they came for.
Evidence
In a Pew Research Center survey of 5,023 U.S. adults, 76% said it is extremely or very important to be able to tell whether content was made by AI or by a person, while 53% were not confident they could tell.10
This week
Pick the saved reply you use most. Rewrite it as you would say it to a friend at a kitchen table, and keep that version.
In Echo
On Echo, a person answers every seeker. The AI does not talk with seekers and does not write a responder’s replies. EchoAnalyst, available now as an add-on, reads the conversation only after it closes, and its coaching note is for the responder.
Principle · 4
Mirror their conversation style
Match their size, then ask if they are with you.
Some seekers answer in a few words. Others write long, winding paragraphs. Match them. Literally look at the size of their messages: if they send one or two short phrases, do not reply with four paragraphs. If they write at length, you can too.
Along the way, ask if they are tracking with you. Do they have questions? Sometimes you are checking that they are still paying attention, and sometimes you need to draw more of their story out. Open questions usually work best, though some people only want short answers.
In practice
Mirror the place as well as the length. A comment under a video wants a line, not a letter. A text is not an email. Reply in the seeker’s language when you can.
Mirroring is not copying. Match the size, not the mood. If they are angry, stay calm.
Evidence
Echo’s own review shows the shape of a real conversation: a conversation counts as reviewable only when both sides say enough to learn from. That is one message each way on email, three on website chat, and two on every other channel.E1
This week
Count the words in the seeker’s last three messages. Make your next reply about that long.
In Echo
Each reply goes back out on the app the seeker used, so a WhatsApp message is answered on WhatsApp. EchoAnalyst’s engagement question asks for open questions and replies short enough to read.
Worksheet
Say it back.
Use it on the next message you are about to answer. Five steps, about two minutes.
- Read the whole message twice. Do not start replying in your head.
- Write what they said in one sentence.
- Name what they seem to feel in one word. Hurt, tired, curious, angry, afraid, hopeful.
- Write one open question that starts with what, how or where.
- Match their size. Their last message was ____ words. Yours should be close.
Principle · 5
Do not assume people are Christian
Ask where Jesus fits. Never ask them to pick a label.
It is easy to assume the person you are talking to is a Christian. Asking directly can be worse: the answer is often the one they think you want, and either answer sets the tone for everything after. Nobody should have to self-identify before we will listen.
We want people to say how they feel, think and believe, rather than how they think they should. So ask open questions: “Where does Jesus fit in your life?” “What is your relationship like with Jesus?” “I have no idea who he is” and “he is my everything” are both good places to begin.
In practice
Seekers write from everywhere, from every faith and none, so do not guess. Listen for the barrier: intellectual, experiential, relational, identity, moral, trust or understanding. Hear which one is in their words before you answer, so you speak to the real obstacle and not the easy one.
Also notice where they start: hostile, skeptical, curious, open, seeking, or already believing. Someone hostile needs patience. Someone already believing needs encouragement.
Evidence
Pew’s Religious Landscape Study found 62% of U.S. adults identify as Christian and 29% as religiously unaffiliated.7 Most of those “nones” still believe in God or another higher power; Pew found only 29% reject the idea of any higher power or spiritual force.8 Do not assume faith, and do not assume its absence.
This week
In your next conversation, find the barrier before you answer. Which of the seven is in what they wrote?
In Echo
EchoAnalyst records where each seeker started, from hostile to already believing, and which of the seven barriers they carry and whether the responder engaged them. When a conversation is too brief to tell, it says unclear rather than guessing.
Principle · 6
Do not use every tool for every job
Choose the right tool for this conversation.
A mechanic has favorite tools and knows them well, but does not use every tool on every job. In the same way we all have favorite stories and answers. Everyone is at a different point on their journey, so choose what fits, and keep listening for which part of the Gospel this seeker needs to hear.
When one conversation goes well, we are tempted to repeat it with the next person. God does not usually work that way. There is no secret order of question, story and transformation. A conversation is a journey, and we ask the Holy Spirit to direct us.
In practice
It applies to channels too. A comment under a video is public. A long email invites a long reply. Write for the place you are standing in.
Before you reach for a favorite, look at what the seeker has already said, and at what has been said to them before. Ask two questions first. Then choose.
Evidence
Echo’s coaching standard names this directly. Its conversation flow question asks for the right pace for the situation: a crisis gets care first, a curious seeker a natural path to the Gospel, a believer encouragement.E1 Depth is judged as substance rather than pat answers.E1
This week
Write down your three favorite stories or answers. In your next conversation, use none of them until you have asked two questions.
In Echo
On a call, the caller’s history is on screen before anyone says hello, and texts from the same number join the same history. A responder who leaves the team does not take conversations with them.
Principle · 7
Do not judge or argue
Healing starts where it is safe to say it.
Many of the people we talk to have been running from God. They may have been hurt by the church, or it may have been a long time since they talked about anything religious. They did not come to be judged or to argue.
If you have been through something like theirs, tell them: “Me too. I know how that feels.” It shows you understand and are not condemning them. We are all broken, and that can be an encouragement. When someone shares in a safe, non-judgmental place, that is where healing starts.
In practice
Keep your own story short and about them. Do not share details that identify you or anyone else, and do not let it turn the conversation toward you.
Truth is not skipped, it is carried gently. When hard things have to be said, say them in love, and only after you have listened.
Evidence
A Barna study with Alpha of U.S. and Canadian teens found that 72% of non-Christian teens (and 66% of Christian teens) say someone who listens without judgment seems comfortable sharing their faith. More than four in five (81%) reject the idea that disagreement means someone is judging you.5
This week
When a seeker says something that makes you want to correct them, answer first with “Tell me more about that.”
In Echo
EchoAnalyst’s relational barrier is exactly this: hurt by the church, by hypocrites, by religious abuse. Its grace-filled truth question, asked only when hard truth comes up, checks it was said in love.
A worked example
Hearing the barrier.
Example
Seeker
I don’t think I’m the kind of person God wants. I’ve done too much.
A reply that misses
God loves everyone! Jesus died for all our sins. Would you like to pray to receive him right now?
A true message, sent as a formula. It skips the guilt and shame in what they wrote (a moral barrier), runs long, and presses for a decision.
A reply that hears
That sounds heavy to carry. What has been weighing on you most?
Says back the feeling, asks one open question, stays short. The Gospel comes next, once you know what they are carrying.
Seeker, later
I left church years ago. People there weren’t kind to me.
A reply that hears
I’m sorry that happened. It was never meant to feel like that. What was it like for you?
A relational barrier. No defense of the church, no argument, and no label asked for. Say “me too” only if it is true for you.
Principle · 8
Do not measure success by results
Be faithful. God gives the growth.
Nothing discourages a responder more than the feeling that they have had no impact because nobody prayed to receive Christ. Sometimes the reaction is to slip into selling, closing the deal and pushing for a decision. That puts people off and ends the conversation.
Our task is to meet people where they are and share the Gospel. Many people hear it several times, in several places, before they respond, and we rarely know whether we are the first voice or the fifth. Paul put it plainly: one plants, another waters, and God gives the growth (1 Corinthians 3:6).
In practice
Do not hold a number. You may hear that people need to hear the Gospel seven to nine times. We know of no study behind a figure like that, so do not promise it to your responders.
Measure what you control. Did the Gospel go out clearly? Was a next step offered? Silence is not failure. A seeker who goes quiet after a complete, caring message was still served well.
Evidence
Many Christians are slow to share at all. Lifeway Research found 55% of monthly churchgoers had not told anyone how to become a Christian in six months,11 and its latest report found 27% of Protestant churchgoers had not shared their faith story with anyone in six months.12 Barna’s U.S. teen study found 77% are at least somewhat motivated to keep learning about Jesus.6
This week
After your next conversation that ends in silence, do not count it as a loss. Write one line: what did I do faithfully?
In Echo
EchoAnalyst reads movement from the seeker’s own words on a five-point scale and says plainly: only God moves hearts. It once marked down a responder who sent a full, caring Gospel message into silence. Coaches pointed it out and the rubric was corrected to reward it.
Principle · 9
Know when to refer
Know when to hand someone to a professional.
Some of the people who contact us are dealing with very serious things and need professional help. We are not counselors. Our goal is to connect people to God and let that relationship be the source of healing, rather than the wisdom of the responder.
Keep a list of counseling resources to share, and be humble enough to refer when someone has a life-threatening issue or something beyond what you are qualified to help with. It can be better to have the Gospel conversation at another time.
In practice
Have a crisis plan before you need one. When suicide, self-harm or abuse comes up, be present first: take it seriously, stay with the person, know your own role, and then point to outside help. Follow your ministry’s own steps and tell your leader at once.
If you think you are talking with a young person, use words that fit their age, nudge them toward a parent or trusted adult, and keep no personal details or ongoing contact. Keep your referral list current for every country your seekers write from.
Evidence
In the United States people can call, text or chat 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline; the National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention publishes messaging guidance around it.13 Other countries have their own numbers, so your list has to be local to the seeker.
This week
Find your ministry’s crisis steps and referral list. Can you find them in under a minute? If not, ask your leader today.
In Echo
Responders can raise a crisis in the moment, and the leaders a ministry chooses are told by email, text or banner. EchoAnalyst reads every reviewable conversation for crisis in five alert tiers, from Critical to Informational, and only flags. Every intervention stays with trained people.
Worksheet
Your crisis card.
Fill it in with your leader before you need it. Keep a copy where you answer.
- The leader I tell right away:
- Where our written crisis steps are kept:
- Our referral list, by country. In the United States, people can call, text or chat 988.13 Write the others your seekers need.
- If I think I am talking with a young person: words that fit their age, a nudge toward a parent or trusted adult, no personal details, no ongoing contact.
- What I do in the first minute: stay with them, say I take it seriously, tell my leader, then point to outside help.
Principle · 10
Share the Gospel
Somewhere in every conversation, turn toward Jesus.
We hear tragic stories, and we want to go deep and help. It is very easy to get caught up in a seeker’s story and forget the one thing we are here to do. Somewhere in each conversation there is a place to turn toward Jesus Christ and share the Good News.
We cannot emphasize this enough. As a ministry, that is why we are here.
In practice
Sharing it well has a shape. Echo’s nine elements of the Gospel are God’s love, sin and brokenness, who Jesus is, the cross, the resurrection, grace, repentance, faith in Christ and the invitation to respond. Five make a full presentation: sin and brokenness, the cross, the resurrection, grace and faith in Christ. Sowing a seed counts when a full one is not possible.
Name a next step that suits where they are: keep exploring, read Scripture, find a church, ask for follow-up, rededicate, or pray.
Evidence
A conversation can go as far as a ministry’s review shows: every analyzed conversation, then the Gospel presented, then a step taken, then a profession of faith. Six kinds of step are recorded, one per conversation.E1 Missed opportunities fall into five kinds: a Gospel transition not taken, an emotional cue passed over, a prayer moment missed, a deeper question left unasked, and Scripture not applied.E1
This week
In your next conversation, find the place where you can turn toward Jesus. Say one sentence about him and ask a question about it.
In Echo
EchoAnalyst records which of the nine elements were shared and the passage quoted, even without a reference. Across a ministry it shows how fully the Gospel is going out, and what training to plan next.
Bonus · 11
Remember to pray
Pray before, during, and after.
No matter how many times you share the Gospel, there are conversations you wish you could do over. Often you realize you did not pray enough in that one. When we try this ministry in our own power we typically fail.
We have to keep asking the Holy Spirit to give us the words, to help us share what he knows the seeker needs to hear. Pray before, during, and after every Gospel conversation.
In practice
Prayer fits inside the conversation too. Offer to pray with the seeker when it is natural, and let them say no. Pray for the person by first name, quietly, afterward. Do not write names down anywhere to do it.
Pray for your team, for the tools you use, and for the leaders who read the numbers. The numbers serve the work. They are not the work.
Evidence
Pew found that 44% of U.S. adults pray daily.9 Lifeway Research found that 56% of churchgoers pray at least weekly for chances to tell others about Jesus, 23% daily, yet 55% had not shared how to become a Christian in six months.11 Praying and speaking go together.
This week
Before you open your next conversation, ask the Spirit for the words. After you close it, pray for that seeker.
In Echo
EchoAnalyst keeps two things as their own data points: whether prayer was offered, and whether the seeker prayed. A ministry can see how often prayer is part of its conversations.
Worksheet
A faithful week.
At the end of each day, three lines. You are measuring faithfulness, not results.
One thing I did faithfully:
One thing to work on:
Someone I prayed for, by first name only:
A conversation that went quiet, and what I will keep doing anyway:
A self-check
Before you press send.
Adapted from the questions EchoAnalyst asks of every reviewable conversation. Eight every time. Three only when the moment arises.
- Listening. Did they feel known?
- Engagement. Did I ask, not just tell, and is it short enough to read?
- Clarity. Is it plain, with jargon explained?
- Depth. Did I go past the surface to what they really need?
- Gospel focus. Did I point toward Jesus in a way that fits this person, now?
- Scripture. Accurate, in context, and for their life?
- Flow. Does the pace fit the moment?
- The close. A warm goodbye, a fitting prayer, and a next step?
Only when it comes up
- Crisis. Did I meet the gravity with presence and a push toward outside help?
- Hard truth. Was it said in love?
- A young person. Words that fit their age, a nudge toward a parent, no personal details?
Sources
Sources.
- Albert Mehrabian, early studies on communicating feelings and attitudes, as summarized in “Albert Mehrabian.” Wikipedia.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Mehrabian - Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, “What Great Listeners Actually Do.” Harvard Business Review (Zenger Folkman white paper).
data.zengerfolkman.com - Twilio, “Key concepts and terms for the WhatsApp Business Platform with Twilio,” documentation (customer service window).
https://www.twilio.com/docs/whatsapp/key-concepts - Twilio, “Introducing Twilio’s Consumer Preferences Report.”
twilio.com - Barna Group with Alpha, “Actions, Invitations, Storytelling: How Gen Z Approaches Evangelism.”
https://www.barna.com/research/gen-z-evangelism/ - Barna Group, “Teens Curious About Jesus” (Open Generation: United States).
https://www.barna.com/trends/teens-curious-about-jesus/ - Pew Research Center, Religious Landscape Study: executive summary.
pewresearch.org - Pew Research Center, “Religious ‘Nones’ in America: Who They Are and What They Believe.”
pewresearch.org - Pew Research Center, “Prayer and other religious practices.”
pewresearch.org - Pew Research Center, “How Americans View AI and Its Impact on People and Society.”
pewresearch.org - Lifeway Research, “Evangelism more prayed for than practiced by churchgoers.”
news.lifeway.com - Lifeway Research, State of Discipleship: Protestant Churchgoer Sharing Christ Report.
research.lifeway.com - National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention, public messaging resources (988 Messaging Framework).
https://theactionalliance.org/messaging/public-messaging - EchoGlobal, “Introducing EchoAnalyst” (the rubric, barriers, funnel, alert tiers and calibration).
https://www.echoglobal.org/product/echoanalyst - EchoGlobal, “Integrations & channels” (channel list and reply windows).
https://www.echoglobal.org/product/integrations
Credits
Whose words these are.
The ten principles and the bonus on prayer were developed by Need Him Global (needhim.org), a ministry that talks with seekers online and uses Echo to do it. The teaching and its voice are theirs, shared here with their permission.
The practice notes, evidence, worksheets, self-check and notes on Echo were written by EchoGlobal. Every description of Echo and EchoAnalyst comes from echoglobal.org.
